Whoever talks first loses! Don't step on your close!

To be fair, some of the underlying principles still apply, but these old sales axioms were not taught with cooperation in mind. Back in the day, the overarching insinuation, when deploying these sales moves, was one of trickery and manipulation.

When I was a little baby sales guy, my manager told me to give my price and shut up. The next one who talks loses. Since then, I've learned that if my customer or potential customer loses, I also lose. Sales and negotiations are not a win/lose situation. Together, my client and I confront an issue, and by employing good communication, we solve problems and sell goods and services to suit us both.

Having said that, there is some wisdom to knowing when to shut up.

Let me tell you a story about my sister, Ann, who unwittingly used this strategy to negotiate a better outcome. Annie was in Greece on holiday. She wanted to hire a boat to tour some of the islands. She was directed to the dock to find a boat and a captain to guide her. When she got there, according to her, the scene looked like a commercial for Greek tourism. The man standing on the deck of the boat looked like he had come straight out of a photo shoot.

Ann said, "He was GORGEOUS!" He stood on that deck with the beautiful blue Mediterranean Sea as a backdrop, fit and trim with dark curly hair, perfectly white teeth, big blue eyes, and a white cotton shirt, wholly unbuttoned to reveal a deeply tanned, athletic frame.

She stared. He said, "Do you want to hire my boat?" Then he stepped onto the dock and quoted his rate. (He even smelled good!) Ann was so overcome by his beauty she literally couldn't speak. Mr. Greek God, taking her silence as a cue that his price was too high, dropped his price. Ann looked at him and though she meant to respond affirmatively, got tongue-tied.

Eros, son of Aphrodite, thought she was hesitating because of price and jumped in to discount further. Ann finally quelled her nerves and booked the boat (with the handsome guide) for a bargain!

So what can we learn from old sales wisdom and my sister's serendipitous negotiation? You've got to give folks a chance to respond. Don't step on your close or whoever talks first was taught with bad intentions. Here is the modern-day answer to this. Ask questions and give the other person room to answer. Then don't be so quick to respond. Think a minute, weigh their answer and measure your response. Allow room for them to expand on their answer.

Sometimes, if you hesitate, someone might add a valuable adjunct to their statement to help you come to a better conclusion.

Own Your Sales Gene...